Deanna Mascle
Do you know what kind of parent you are? This is an important
question to answer because as a parent your end goal is to raise
a happy, healthy, successful child and to reach that goal you
need to be the best parent you can be.
The four main parenting styles are determined by the level of
warmth and control that parents exert over their child. These
two key factors then create four categories of parenting styles:
indulgent, authoritarian, authoritative, and uninvolved. Each of
these parenting styles reflects different natural patterns of
parental values, practices, and behaviors and a distinct balance
of response and demand.
* Indulgent parents are more responsive than they are demanding.
Nontraditional and lenient, they do not require mature behavior,
allow much self-regulation, and avoid confrontation. Indulgent
parents may be further divided into two types: democratic
parents, who, though lenient, are more conscientious, engaged,
and committed to the child, and nondirective or permissive
parents.
* Authoritarian parents are highly demanding and directive, but
not responsive. They do not explain orders but expect total
obedience. These parents provide well-ordered and structured
environments with clearly stated rules. Authoritarian parents
can be divided into two types: those who are not intrusive or
autocratic in their use of power and those who are highly
intrusive.
* Authoritative parents are both demanding and responsive. They
set clear standards for their child's conduct, but their
disciplinary methods are supportive, rather than punitive. They
are assertive, but not intrusive and restrictive as they want
their children to be assertive as well as socially responsible,
cooperative, and self-regulated.
* Uninvolved parents are low in both response and demand. In
extreme cases, this parenting style might encompass both
rejection and neglect.
Parenting styles not only differ in terms of response and demand
but also the extent of psychological control they extend over
their child. Psychological control is the attempt to intrude
into the psychological and emotional development of the child
through use of parenting practices such as guilt, shame, and
withdrawal of love. One key difference between authoritarian and
authoritative parenting is in the dimension of psychological
control. Both authoritarian and authoritative parents place high
demands on their children and expect their children to behave
appropriately and obey parental rules. Authoritarian parents,
however, also expect their children to accept their judgments,
values, and goals without question. In contrast, authoritative
parents are more open to give and take with their children and
offer more explanation. Therefore, although authoritative and
authoritarian parents are both high in behavioral control,
authoritative parents tend to be low in psychological control,
while authoritarian parents tend to be high.
Learning more about your own parenting style can help you become
a more effective parent and raise a more successful child.
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